January 2008                         Roger & Patricia Willard©2008              Vol. 3, No. 1



Observations of Life. I can still say, “Happy New Year!” even though it is a week into it. Like most people, I think of the new year as a time to do a little planning. Depending on where you work, you may have already had to pick vacation days that you want to take in 2008. We have already “inked” in several weeks and there are some that are just penciled in. I enjoy flexibility, but it is always nice to have some fixed time off that I can look forward to.

            As an entrepreneur I look forward to the coming year as a time to try new marketing ideas. I enjoy discovering what works for me and what doesn’t. And the fact that something did not work as much as I liked, doesn’t mean that I failed or the project failed, it just was not the right one at the time or could have been better. It always gives me information from which to learn. Sometimes it has a good ROI, sometimes not. But whatever happens, I learned something new from it.

            The new year, though, is just a reminder for me. If you think about it, we have a number of “New Year’s Day” moments many times throughout the year. Going way back in my lifetime beginning around age 5, I, like most, started some level of schooling. You had your first day of school. You learned about the first day of the week. You were off weekends and then Monday happened again and you started a new week. Christmas came and you had Christmas vacation. You probably didn’t care so much about New Year’s Day then as you did about the day you had to go back to school after it.

            Maybe you had a brief Easter or spring break and then back to school again. Finally, June and sometime around the end of the first week or so, summer vacation began. And year after year you would repeat the process, doing it all over again.

            Soon into this process you learned of being promoted. At the end of the school year you would “pass” to the next grade (most of the time). At some point it started becoming important to you the grade you were in. It became part of your identity. From then on, I, like almost everyone else, was partly known by what grade I was in. Imagine what it was like when you were a 6th grader and then promoted to the 7th grade. And with this promotion, you may have thought now you’re a big kid in middle school. And with this upgrade in your identity as a student, the school year calendar became more important to you. September and Labor Day meant a new beginning in that part of your life.

            After high school you start to enter the “real world” in some way. You may go to college, start a job, join the service, but most of the time, have to deal with adult responsibilities which meant that your calendar changed. Before you may have just thought about your future, now you had to start living the life for which you planned. In some cases, you started living the life you didn’t plan. You now thought more about tomorrow and the tomorrrows to come. You started to think long-term, maybe it was four or more years of college. If you went right to work, you began a new calendar of possible shiftwork, days off and vacation. If college, you might have thought about breaks and maybe picking up some credits over the summer, but thinking of graduation. You were definitely thinking ahead.

            Your future, your personal calendar was beginning to take shape. By your mid- twenties, you were really on your own and it was up to you to decide what you were really going to do. You may say that, “well, I got a job and had to go to work”, but in reality, it was really just a choice. A choice to go to work or not get paid, or find another job. But you were working on planning your days, weeks, months and even years ahead on your calendar. And that’s life.

            Throughout history, the individual has had to expand his or her calendar. The caveman thought ahead mostly in terms of food and shelter for today and if time, something for tomorrow. Eventually, seasons made planning for farming important. Then organized man, civilizations, nations, countries, and societies in general created new situations for us to live by calendars. Thousands of years ago calendars were made by stargazers for man to live by. We make rules to live by with calendars. Calendars give us organization. And that’s life.

            But what if something happened that changed all of that? What if your calendar changed? What if...? What if something happened to you to make you rethink your personal calendar?

            What I am about to say does not mean one should be irresponsible, but rather cause you to re-examine your life. And the best way I can do this is to tell you something about me. At age 41 I had a small heart attack. Two years later I had to have a second angioplasty. Six years after that I had triple bypass surgery. I was 49 at the time and now am 56 years old. Now, “How did this change my calendar?” First, I did not make any real changes in my calendar the first time. The second time I started thinking about it. After I had my surgery, I re-thought my life and calendar.

            Up to this time I let events and other things push my calendar and my life in a direction that was not healthy for me. Although I enjoyed my work, and most of the time I thought I was controlling the stress, I was not. It was not until after the surgery that I made real changes. It is one of the main reasons I got back into the serious study of hypnosis. I had to change my life and my calendar. I had to stop always thinking about tomorrow. Again, not to say this is an excuse to be irresponsible, but rather that there are things you can do something about and there are things you can do nothing about. Concern is natural, worry is a killer. It almost got me.

            When I was told I had to have surgery, I let go then and there. There were events going on in my life that I had to turn over to others and some to God. I know hundreds of people prayed for me and my surgery and for this I am very thankful. I was cut on a Wednesday at 8:00 a.m. and woke up around 3:00 that afternoon. I was home by Sunday feeling not perfect, but really good. I was not permitted to work for thirty days and had time to think.

            From that time on I decided that my life would not be stressed by worry about the past, or what is on the calendar for tomorrow. My calendar is now, although not perfect, one that does not have a place for stress for things that are out of my control. I do for others as I can. I give thanks daily for what I have. I know I am human and will falter, but that is what we all are, human and not perfect beings. I do accept this.

            A calendar is part of our lives. Yesterday is X’d out, tomorrow is going to come and most of the time the stuff we worry about in all of those tomorrows will probably not happen or not be as bad as we imagined. And even though there will be things that I hope never happen, they will. I will grieve, I will hurt and I will cry, but if our Creator still wishes me to go on, I will. You see since I had my surgery 6 years ago I have been given an extra day every day since. I have a loving wife for almost 33 years, two wonderful daughters, three fantastic grandchildren and another one on the way. Every day is a blessing. I have more than I ever imagined and probably more than I deserve. I have a great calendar. I cannot see how many days are on it, but the pages that are torn off are filled with notes of an extraordinary life.


Books We Liked.

One of our girls went to college about 250 miles from home. Another at one time lived about 240 miles from us. At other times Patti and I would take vacations where we would be on the road for 6 to 8 hours a day. Point is, we spent a lot of time on the road in our car or van. A while back we started to get books on tape (now on CDs). Our local library has a great collection and before one of our trips or visits to our daughters, I would pick up a couple and we would listen to them on the road.

            This month’s book is really a recommendation of a series of books. Once in a while I will get the Sunday New York Times and read the Book Review from it. Since I am also a licensed private detective I tend to gravitate toward mysteries. I had noticed this particular author being reviewed as a mystery writer and thought her books might be something I would enjoy. After listening to one myself on a trip I had to take, I got others for both of us to enjoy together. Diana Mott Davidson has 14 books about her main character Goldy, a sometimes struggling caterer in Aspen Meadows, Colorado. With what I find to be a vivid cast of characters, some permanent, and some that come and go, her stories are ones that keep you mentally stimulated and involved. Within the series she does eventually marry a police detective named Tom Shultz. She also has a son from a previous marriage, the only good thing that came out of a bad marriage. There is also a best friend who also happens to be divorced from the same ex-husband who adds additional flavor throughout the series. And with this cast Goldy finds herself realistically pulled into or thrust into situations testing her culinary skills as well as her detective capabilities. Sometimes burnt toast is the least of her worries. The first book I listened to was Sticks and Scones published in 2002 and later listened to other stories before and after this one.

            The stories are peppered and seasoned with her making dishes, desserts and main courses which she describes in some detail. If you read the books rather than listen to the audio version, you will find that the book will list the full recipe in it. Myself being somewhat handy in the kitchen and Patti more than proficient, we both enjoyed the culinary titbits she provides. So if you have the opportunity, check out her latest book, Sweet Revenge and tell me what you think. Then go back and check some of the earlier titles and see how it all begins.


 Quotes we liked.

“When you are through changing, you are through.” by Bruce Barton. By now you probably know that I believe that it is important to recognize the need for change in your life. Change can take you in many directions. But, like anything, it can take you to good places or it can take you to not so good places. With positive change, you are progressing or moving toward things that are fulfilling and rewarding. Careless change can take you to self-destruction if you are not careful. It really is your choice. But one thing is for sure, if you are not changing or if you are just standing still in life, you are going nowhere. You are waiting for everything to come to you. Change is movement; change is natural; and change can be scary. Change just is. So, why not direct your change? Find out where and what you want to be. If you are 17 or 70, you can still learn new things and make changes. If you don’t make changes in your life and in your world, someone else probably will and that probably will not be a good thing. Embrace change and look forward to it excitedly. Think about it and make the change.


What to expect.

In talking to people about hypnosis, the term visualization comes up. Inevitably, a number of people will say they are not good at visualizing things. If asked to close their eyes and told to try to visualize some particular item or place, they say they can’t do it. But, to their amazement, I can show that even though they don’t see clear pictures in their mind as if they were watching a movie or TV, to some degree they can experience something in their mind. An easy way to illustrate this is if I asked you to pick a room in your home, office or some place that you have been in many times that has windows. Now, tell me how many windows are in that room. Flash; you probably just counted the windows. Think about it. In some way you probably mentally looked around and somehow saw the windows. The visualization you just experienced was probably one of somehow seeing or knowing the walls around you in the room as you mentally put yourself there.

            Most of the time when we say visualize, we will also say things like, imagine, pretend, feel, hear or otherwise experience the place, event or whatever it is we ask you to do. Even though you don’t see bright clear pictures in your mind, you do mentally imagine something that creates an experience. It is just one of the tools used to help you make the changes you want to make using hypnosis. Just remember this basic

tenet of change. What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. If the mind, through visualization and other means accepts a concept or belief about that individual, it accepts is as if it is real. If a person begins to visualize the change desired and can believe it is possible, the body and mind will act that way to the best of its ability. If you now begin to accept that you can lose weight, you will then start acting that way and do things that will make it happen. But it is just one necessary part of the process. With each new goal a new thing must be seen and believed. Here’s to a new you with just a little believing and a little visualization.

This is a publication of the

Willard Hypnosis Center

3304 Main Street

Conestoga, PA 17516


toll-free 877-872-7561



That’s all for this month. We look forward to hearing from you if you have any questions about hypnosis and how we can serve you. Remember, if you are receiving this newsletter secondhand and want to receive your own copy, just send us an email and we will put you on either our snail mail list or email list.

Roger & Patti